The Fiction We Believe

Have you ever been in a situation where someone assumed something about you instead of just asking? And while they carried on believing their version of the truth, you were left overthinking, confused, and hurt? I’ve been there—more times than I can count. And honestly, I’m exhausted. It’s frustrating to deal with people who find it easier to assume than to communicate. Maybe, for them, staying silent seems like the better choice—it avoids confrontation, keeps their life free from unnecessary chaos. But what about the other person? The one who just wants clarity, who doesn’t want misunderstandings to fester, who believes that a simple conversation could prevent an unnecessary mess?

What baffles me even more is when people not only assume but also spread their assumptions like facts. Instead of talking to the person involved, they talk about them—to friends, colleagues, or even strangers—shaping a false narrative. And that’s where the real damage begins. Because now, it's not just one person believing in a made-up story; it’s an entire group feeding off assumptions. Meanwhile, the person at the center of it all has no idea what’s happening or why people have suddenly changed towards them. It’s unfair, to say the least. Why is it so hard to ask, “Hey, this happened. What’s your side of the story?” instead of making up a version that suits one’s convenience?

Now, let’s talk about both perspectives. I try to be fair, even when I’m frustrated. I understand why people avoid communication. Maybe they think the conversation will lead to an argument. Maybe they’re afraid of hearing something they don’t want to. Or maybe they just don’t care enough to put in the effort. And I get it—some situations don’t need to be dragged. But isn’t a five-minute talk better than days, weeks, or even months of misunderstanding? On the other side, there are people like me, who overthink, who spiral into a thousand what-ifs when things are left unclear. And to us, silence is louder than words. It doesn’t bring peace; it brings confusion, anxiety, and unnecessary emotional exhaustion.

So, who is right? Honestly, neither fully. Avoiding communication is wrong because it builds unnecessary distance. But expecting people to communicate when they don’t want to is equally exhausting. The solution? We cannot force others to talk, but we can choose how much energy we invest in people who refuse to communicate. If someone repeatedly chooses assumption over conversation, maybe it’s time to stop explaining yourself to them. Maybe the right people, the ones who truly care, will always be willing to talk, to understand, and to clear things up before jumping to conclusions. We need to normalize asking instead of assuming, listening instead of speculating, and most importantly, communicating instead of creating fictional narratives in our heads.

I know that most people won’t relate to this blog because assumption has become a default setting in today’s world. But if even one person pauses and realizes how much damage a lack of communication can cause, I’d consider this piece successful. Because at the end of the day, the truth is simple : Assumptions ruin relationships, and communication saves them. If you have something to say, say it. If you have a doubt, ask. If you feel something is off, clarify. Because no matter how much we try to justify silence, it will never bring the peace that honest communication does.

Now, I’d love to hear your thoughts—are you someone who values communication, or do you find assumptions easier to deal with? Drop your views in the comments and let’s talk about it!